a day..

you know life has changed..of late i find myself more drawn to silence..the happiness i felt at times has disappeared..kab does make me happy but if not for him, id be an unhappy person..not to say im sad but just lack of happiness..i cannot seem to pin point whats wrong but somethings amiss..my usual humour, spark and enthusiasm are lost..whether it is the mundane or the pressures or experiences, they have all changed me..so while you complain, i retreat further into my silence cos that is where the solace is..

gaurav, today as I was going to work, and was listening to this song and a thought crossed my mind..this song epitomises you in many ways.. Roothe khaabon ko mana lenge Kati patango ko thaamenge Haa haa hai jazba Suljha lenge uljhe rishton ka manjha  today you stand before me..self made,continously pursuing your dreams, making them come true, overcoming everything that came your way, slowly and steadily growing, never letting go of that fire to prove yourself again and again. Soyi taqdeere jaga denge Kal ko ambar jhuka denge you have started from a scratch and today we can stand back and applaud..from where we were to where we have come..your effort has made it happen. to others it may seem just very ordinary but i ahve been through this with you and i know what it has taken..what you have gone through and i can only say it has grown..made you a better person..humbled you.. life has its share of ups and downs and we never chose our circumstances..but its u...

Ok so I'm a mommy now..its been three months and kabeer has been the center of my life..and I pretty much have forgotten how life was before him..he tires me, makes me angry, frustrated, and also makes me wonder what I am doing right but he also makes my day when he wakes up, sees my face and lights up, giving me a heartfelt smile of recognition..when he needs me to comfort him, the way he giggles when I cuddle him..makes me forget my fatigue.. Well, motherhood is the toughest job I've encountered..it takes a whole lot of ones physical and mental strength to raise a child..it requires the ability to take on responsibility for someone, their entire life..having known this I don't know if I understand it or even emulate it..cos I do get upset with my own parents, with kabeer..more often than not..I do realize my shortcoming but sometimes it just feels the right thing to do..to let my steam off..to scream..coming back to responsibility..it will depend on us on what kind of ch...